26 luglio 2010

Open letter to the doggies: 4 reasons to say why The End Of History is totally wrong

Dear Brewdog headquarters,
here are a few thoughts about the release of the brand new The End Of History:

1) As long as a 5% abv single malt is not a whisky, a 55% abv mammoth is not a beer - just because beer should be drunk by the glass, not by the dropper.

2) Packing bottles inside stoats and squirrels IS totally wrong - it spits on all veggies and animal rights supporters out there, I don't care if those rats died on their own or were killed for purpose.

3) Beer is a drink for the masses - making a dozen bottles sold at 500/700 pounds each is saying only kings, and queens, and gods, and cunts can get their hands on them. Beer for punks? How can you continue your revolutionary brewing reaching only ten people in the world?

4) I'm convinced The End Of History won't increase nor decrease your sales, so frankly this beer is totally useless - except this, 170 mainstream mentions, 2000 Twitter messages, 400+ post thread on Beer Advocate in 60 hours plus this post means you are winners and we are losers.

***

Given that, high five for the world-brewery status and the awards you achieved in just 3 years: some of your beers (I'd say Punk, Trashy and Chaos Theory above all) are awesome examples of your pushing-the-boundaries-of-traditional-brewing purposes, and your guerrilla marketing and killer videos give back beer the youngness, freshness and fizzyness it deserves. Let's go back and focus on that now.

Cheers & beers (the real ones)!

A.

6 commenti:

Leo ha detto...

I considered writing this post in english 'cause referred directly to non-italian speaking people.
It's the first one, and maybe others will come, who knows...

It would be truly appreciated if all Italian readers will post comments in english.

Tyrser ha detto...

BTW, having such a big echo on the press with these "jokes" sounds to me pretty like the "wannabe footballplayer next wife" who poses for Page 3: who cares if you have brain since you have t*ts?
Who are Brewdogs: those who fill squirrels or those who brew?

SR ha detto...

I will ask Italian and foreign readers an extra effort. This is my thoughts about Brewdog, in my own dialect.

Par me pusè che du piral ien propri du perdabal. Dem da tra: mandì da via i ciap Brewdog e anduma a bev una bela Dupont.

Anonimo ha detto...

"Open letter to Superfantagenio: 1 reason to say why The End Of History is toally right"

1) anche tu, come una miriade di altri fagiani in amore, senti l'irrefrenabile bisogno di scrivere un post della ceppa su una birra della ceppa

Leo ha detto...

@Anonimo

Chiunque non firmi lettere aperte non merita la mia attenzione.

Anonimo ha detto...

Non era una lettera aperta. Te stavo a cojonà.

Se preferisci posso firmarmi Pio Pao.

Un abbraccio.